How to Start a Conversation with a Deaf Person

awareness deaf culture deaf life May 22, 2024

Many people have asked me if they should approach a Deaf person if they know a little ASL but can't really hold a long in-depth conversation. I say, introduce yourself. Tell the Deaf person that you are learning ASL. Tell them what level you're at and where you are learning. 

When an ASL student comes up to me and tells me what level they are, that automatically lets me know how I should sign/interact with them. If I don't know that at the beginning, then I will sign normally and expect the other person to keep up. If they tell me way later that they are an ASL 1 student, then I'm frustrated and unsure how to continue the conversation. 

Be honest about your signing skills and the Deaf community will (most likely) be happy you are learning. Many hearing people don't bother communicating with us never mind in our natural language. So kudos to you for trying! Keep it up!

If you're struggling to communicate with a Deaf person, use your phone notes app to type out what you want to say.

Some things not to do:

1) Don't stare at people signing. Walk up and introduce yourself. (Just don't do this at a bank)

2) Don't expect the Deaf person to tell you their life story or teach you. Sometimes we will but it shouldn't be the expectation.

3) Don't assume the Deaf person needs an interpreter. If you want to ask if we need help, sure. But don't jump into a conversation and interpret. 

4) Don't expect us to lipread and don't ask if we can lipread. It's not a fair question since we only get 30% of what you are saying via lipread only. Please write it down or sign it.

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